Grief and Disbelief

It's been a rough week and a half for Troy and I. After being at a fun going away BBQ for a friend on Memorial Day, we found out that Brad--one of our oldest, dearest friends from Minnesota passed away.

Brad and Troy had been friends since the 5th grade. We all lived together for several years in college. I've been alternating between shock, sadness, disbelief, and guilt at not having kept in better touch with Brad in recent years.

I'm thankful that we were able to go home for a few days to deal with this roller coaster of emotions. So many good friends came together to make the service particularly special and to grieve together. We looked at old pictures, drank Knob Creek bourbon, had a pie fight (which I mostly hid in the woods from), burned a giant 82, lit off fireworks and sat around a campfire and told stories about Brad.

Many stories are humorous and silly. Brad had an amazing sense of humor. He was also a gentle, kind person and an incredible musician.

There are some great tributes to our friend here: http://www.gonzoscience.com/GonzoUSA/?p=1619

Some stories we heard illustrated the impact Brad had on people's lives. Troy and I realized that it was Brad who brought us together 14 years ago. Brad had a percussion audition at St. Cloud State where I was going to college. Even though we all went to the same high school, I didn't know Troy and Brad that well but they came down to stay with me and my friend and check out the school. I guess you could say that I influenced Troy's decision to go there.

Troy performed the funeral service and gave the eulogy. He did a fantastic job of honoring our friend. I am so very proud of the unbelievable strength he exhibited through this painful process.

It's surreal and strange and it feels wrong to be trying to get back to "normal" life after a loss like this. It really puts into perspective that people are what are important in life.